How do you keep your new
Hypnotist Monica Dobbie says focus on the
end result rather than the negative habit
Wednesday, January 06,
Whether it's quitting smoking, taking up running
or getting to bed earlier - new year's resolutions are much easier to make
than they are to keep.
|* Photo by Helen Jardine. You can do it:
Hypnotist Monica Dobbie says many new year’s resolutions fail
because people wrongly focus on the negative habit rather than the
But hypnotist Monica Dobbie says this is
simply because we are approaching the whole thing the wrong way.
have to actually want to change our behaviour, rather than just look at it
as something we should change.
"New year's resolutions are three
words that many of us shrink away from because we've made them every year
but haven't been able to keep them," said Ms Dobbie. "They are like broken
promises to ourselves.
"The reason that we so often fail is that we
focus on the negative habit that we want to change and on what we should
do; not on what we really want to do."
example, Ms Dobbie explained that if we focused more on the end result -
what our life would be like once we have stopped smoking, or the clothes
we will fit into when we are slimmer, or what our home would look like if
we were tidier - it would be a lot easier to stick to our
"We need to ask ourselves what will be the 'reward' we
will get from stopping smoking," she said. "For exercise it may be having
a greater fitness level or feeling more energetic.
question 'what's in this for me?' and write it down. Then, anytime you are
struggling and you ask yourself 'why am I doing this?' you read it and
remind yourself that you are getting closer to what you really
Also, the way you word your resolution can be crucial to
Nobody wants to "give up" anything or "lose"
anything, so Ms Dobbie advises her clients to use the words "stop", "quit"
or "become slimmer."
She says that making
resolutions is a very positive thing to do in life as it sets you goals
and provides a sense of challenge and accomplishment.
you are not sure what you would like to change in your life, she says one
way is to ask the "miracle question".
The miracle question goes
like this: "If a miracle took place in the night and you wake up to a life
that is exactly as you want it, how would you know a miracle had taken
place? What would you see, hear and feel?"
Although Ms Dobbie
admits that it is entirely possible to achieve your new year's goals
simply by being positive and optimistic, adding hypnosis to the mix will
make things "85 per cent easier".
She said: "We tend to think that
by consciously forcing ourselves or by having more willpower, we will
stick to our resolutions. And, although we do need commitment in order to
change a habit, the subconscious is more powerful than the conscious. It
is when we communicate directly with the subconscious, through hypnosis,
that permanent change happens."
For example, if we have had many
years of negative self-talk (such as 'I'm not good enough', 'I can't
succeed', 'I'm a failure' etc.), then when we look in the mirror on New
Year's Day and tell ourself "I'm a wonderful person", our subconscious
mind will reject that right away.
Ms Dobbie says this is where
people can use hypnosis to create healthy, positive changes in their
She said: "What a hypnotherapist can
do for us is to employ their expertise in a professional and systematic
manner that helps us to change our mindset about negative habits and life
changes that we want to make.
"Step by step, we discover that our
resolutions are well within our reach and that with professional help,
they can become our reality. We begin to live a new life that is full of
promise, possibility and permanent action - not broken
"New year's resolutions give us a focus of intention
and a direction for change. Thinking about them should make us feel good -
excited, expanded, uplifted, challenged. If not, we should find some
others that do!"
You can contact Monica Dobbie on 505 7531 or email
Change@HypnosisBermuda.com. Her website is:
Content © 2010 Bermuda Sun
|Software © 1998-2010
1up! Software, All Rights